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Mars Will Send No More

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Mars Will Send No More

Tag Archives: Wonder Woman

Bryan Hitch on Justice League

11 Sunday Apr 2021

Posted by Mars Will Send No More in superhero

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Atom, Bryan Hitch, Green Lantern, JLA, Justice Leage, Justice League of America, Laura Martin, Mark Waid, paul neary, Rao, Superman, Wonder Woman

While everyone else was obsessing over “The Snyder Cut”, I skipped all that and dug up some Justice League issues featuring Bryan Hitch, whose work I loved on The Authority, The Ultimates, and Fantastic Four. Here are the highlights.

In 2000, DC published a “100-Page Spectacular” called Heaven’s Ladder, written by Mark Waid and brought to life by the comic-art dream team of Hitch on pencils, long-time collaborator Paul Neary on inks, and the incomparable Laura Martin on colors. The story begins on the microscopic level as The Atom does microsurgery on viral DNA, then expands to truly epic scale as the most massive spaceship I’ve ever seen steals Earth from its orbit.

Bigger than big, as only Bryan Hitch can render it.

The epic scale is why I recommend reading this book in digital format instead of the perfect-bound paperback format. In the paperback, too much of the art is swallowed by the gutter, the area of book pages that “disappears” near the spine—not just Hitch’s masterful two-page spreads, but even some of the dialogue. It would have worked much better in print if DC broke it into smaller issues in standard, stapled comic-book format so we could open the books all the way to see everything.

Still, the visual splendor is undeniable. What is there not to love about Wonder Woman being a total bad-ass and taking on a fleet of spaceships, wrangling one with her lasso and steering it on a collision course with a planet where it explodes, leaving her to emerge from the flames with a look that wordlessly says, “Is that all you’ve got?”

Lassoing a spaceship?! Go, Diana!

This tale has many great moments like that. I especially love Superman’s line of dialogue as the team goes into combat, where only three words lend all the emotional punch that’s needed on a perfectly rendered double-splash page.

“We’ll handle god.” Nuff said!

Without giving away the plot, I’ll say that Waid’s script includes many thought-provoking concepts, including how different sentient races conceive of the afterlife in different ways. It’s a “thinking man’s” Justice League story, but if you think about it too hard, some of it makes no sense. For example, members of the League are forced to become exposition machines to explain to the reader what is being seen on the page, even when it seems improbable that they would understand the crazy cosmic stuff they are looking at.

Thanks for the exposition, Atom! Where we would we be without you?

Plus, Waid’s use of “science” concepts conveniently ignores plenty of science in service of the plot. For example, a bunch of planets are held in place by some kind of hand-waving gravity thingies, but if planets were really as close to each other as depicted, their gravities would rip each other apart. Worse, the Earth is removed from its orbit and *spoiler alert* gets put back in place at the end. But what about the moon? I can suspend my disbelief to think a giant spaceship took Earth away, even without the ship being crushed into a sphere by its own massive gravity. But I can’t believe that the moon would be waiting for Earth when it got back. The moon would be long gone!

If you can kick back and enjoy the spectacle without overthinking it too much, if you’d love to see the Justice League in a cosmic-level battle drenched in glorious color and eye-popping art, give Heaven’s Ladder a shot.

I looked into more of Hitch’s work on Justice League, and my favorite story is a multi-issue drama where a legendary Kryptonian god named Rao comes to Earth with wonderful gifts and apparently benevolent purposes. He turns out to be a scumbag, and the conflict is not just interplanetary but involves a bit of time travel, too.

Cue the arrival of more god-level starships by Bryan Hitch!

Even with Hitch writing and penciling, we get “sciencey” stuff that ends up making no sense. The thing that bugged me most was how it’s clearly stated that part of the evil plan involves genetically altering humans, but the plot conveniently sweeps that detail under the rug by saying the solution to stopping Rao’s control over humans is an electrical blast. I am willing to suspend my disbelief in favor of the old trope that electricity can do anything—and look awesome while doing it—but you can’t genetically alter the human race then just ignore that.

So, like Heaven’s Ladder, the Rao storyline is one to be enjoyed for its epic scale of conflict and jaw-dropping artwork, just so long as you don’t require your science-fiction to be consistently scientific when it might get in the way of advancing the plot.

Finally, I read the first arc of Justice League that Hitch wrote after the “Rebirth” nonsense at DC. I call it nonsense because DC realized they had screwed up some things with the New 52 and decided the solution was to reveal that Dr. Manhattan from the totally unrelated Watchmen had been altering DC history, leading once again to a complete overhaul of the hapless “DC Universe”.

“Excuse me while I try to talk Superman into doing Superman stuff.”

This is such a stupid idea and such a horrible use of Watchmen characters that I get angry just thinking about it. Back in the 1980s, DC revamped their whole universe with Crisis on Infinite Earths, and it seemed like a decent idea at the time—even a dramatic, exciting, and original one. But now, every time DC sees declining sales, the big bosses decide they need to do some pointlessly convoluted mega-event to give all their comics a simultaneous makeover. Let’s have an Infinite Crisis! Let’s have a Final Crisis! Let’s have a New 52 relaunch! Let’s have a Flashpoint! Let’s have a Rebirth! Let’s reboot everything all the time!

Let’s give me a frickin’ break, DC. All you need to do is write awesome stories with awesome art about awesome characters. The constant reshuffling of the DC Universe every few years is garbage. I don’t usually rant on this blog, but this is a major flaw that Hitch needed to deal with in the pages of Justice League. Suddenly, we have a new Superman who is really the old Superman from an alternate universe, and he doesn’t want to do his world-saving job because he is married or something, so the League needs to talk him into it, despite Batman not trusting him because it isn’t the right Superman. Please, make it stop. Even Marvel has been infected by this mentality now. Stop revamping and smashing “universes” together!

It was cool the first time. Now cut it out!

To Hitch’s credit, he did the best he could with the flaming pile of dog crap that DC management left on his porch. The result is a bunch of characters who don’t talk or act like the characters we’ve known for decades, but more like they are in a vintage Authority story using different costumes. Batman acts like Jack Hawksmoor. Wonder Woman acts like Jenny Sparks. It kind of worked for me because I loved Hitch’s run on The Authority, but I felt like this “Rebirth” version of the League wasn’t really the League at all.

Still, the story looks absolutely amazing even though Hitch didn’t draw it. One of my favorite moments is Wonder Woman’s first scene in the adventure, where once again she is portrayed as an absolute bad-ass, a goddess you do not want to mess with. Behold.

“I’m here on a mission of peace… which involves kicking major ass with a lightning bolt!”

Hitch ignited a fanboy crush on Wonder Woman I didn’t know I had! And even the new/old Superman gets some awesome moments, too. Is Hitch’s work on Justice League an indispensable part of my collection? No, but it looks so damn good that I can’t avert my eyes, and it includes memorable moments for these characters in the kind of grand conflicts that made The Authority such a joy to read. It’s a mixed bag, but one worth looking into if you want to see the League save the universe in style.

Collector’s Guide: JLA: Heaven’s Ladder appears in the 2011 reprint or digital format. Hitch was working on JLA (1997) around the same time. The Rao storyline in Justice League of America is in single issues or hardcover. Justice League after the “Rebirth” appears in single issues or TPB.

Jim Lee’s Wonder Woman!

29 Wednesday May 2013

Posted by Mars Will Send No More in superhero

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Brian Azzarello, Jim Lee, Scott Williams, Superman, Superman For Tomorrow, Wonder Woman

Collector’s Guide: From Superman: For Tomorrow by Brian Azzarello, Jim Lee, and Scott Williams. Originally printed as Superman #204-215; DC Comics, 2004. Collected in Superman For Tomorrow Hardcover and Paperback.

Tandy Whiz Kids Save Metropolis with 1982 Computer Tech

22 Friday Feb 2013

Posted by Mars Will Send No More in educational

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Alec and Shanna, Computer Masters of Metropolis, Curt Swan, DC Comics, Frank Chiaramonte, Paul Kupperberg, Radio Shack, Superman, Superman Radio Shack Giveaway, Tandy Whiz Kids, Wonder Woman

Witness the glory of “Computer Masters of Metropolis!” in our gallery today. This free promotional comic book from Radio Shack perfectly captures the state of consumer computer tech in 1982. I know, because I was there. I got this book when it came out! Dad worked at Radio Shack back then, and he always brought home a copy of their comics for me. You might get a laugh now in 2013, but things like “a subscription to an information retrieval service” were a big deal in those thrilling days of yesteryear.

So, try to imagine a primitive world before people born during the Clinton administration were old enough to legally buy beer! In this world, you loaded computer programs and video games from a cassette player. It made a high-pitched tortured mechanical scream the whole time, and the low-fi games were all written in BASIC. Alec and Shanna — the Tandy Whiz Kids, named for Radio Shack’s Tandy computers and TandyVision video games — use this ancient tech to save the day. They look up newspaper articles about Lex Luthor to help save Superman! What nerds!

The scene which most chills my blood shows young Alec working in silence for an hour as the computer gives him problem after problem at speeds faster than he ever could have imagined. NNAYARGH! That precisely describes several really awful temp jobs I had in the mid-1990s!

Compuserve was a big deal when these comics came out, and it gets several mentions. Whatever happened to Compuserve? Hey, you can read all about them on the greatest “information retrieval service” to date: Wikipedia!

I haven’t reproduced the whole issue here, just some of the stunningly “old-school” technology. The part about Superman is cheese-eriffic, but Wonder Woman makes a good electronics teacher!

Collector’s Guide: From Superman Radio Shack Giveaway #2; DC Comics, 1982. The Whiz Kids also had their own title published by Archie in 1986. Whiz Kids afficionados can find it under Whiz Kids Radio Shack Giveaway. Story by Paul Kupperberg; Art by Curt Swan and Frank Chiaramonte.







Wonder Woman Babysits a Dinosaur!

12 Monday Nov 2012

Posted by Mars Will Send No More in dinosaur, golden age

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Charles Moulton, dinosaur, golden age, tyrannosaurus rex, Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman takes a bet for charity. She babysits a bunch of fearsome animals, including the most fearsome of all: Tyrannosaurus Rex! We’ll share with you just the dino-centric pages from that story. Thanks to Boing Boing for hipping us to this golden age dinosaur comic by Wonder Woman’s creator, Charles Moulton!

Collector’s Guide: From Wonder Woman #90; DC Comics, May 1957.



Time You Tasted The Serpent’s Kiss!

14 Monday Feb 2011

Posted by Mars Will Send No More in superhero

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

DC Comics, George Perez, occult, Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman and her supporting cast journey to a hellish underworld to confront the god of fear. Inimitably rendered by George Perez, Wonder Woman kicks some demon butt! George Perez’s 1987-1989 run on Wonder Woman remains a favorite visual interpretation of our favorite Amazon princess.

Collector’s Guide: from Wonder Woman #5, DC Comics, 1987.

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